A student said to his master, “You teach me fighting. But you talk about peace. How do you reconcile the two?“
The master replied, “It is better to be a warrior in a garden than to be a gardener in a war.”
Let’s answer the question, Why Should Dads Do Martial Arts?
You’ll see how it will transform your life if you decide to walk the path of a Martial Artist, and not only how it can easily get rid of the Dad Bod, but also how your whole family dynamic will rebuild on better foundations.
We’ll talk about:
- The most powerful gift you can give and receive from your Martial Arts and fitness journey
- Why you need to know self-defence
- The way your family will look at you after you start your transformation journey
- And why it’s such a great way to relieve stress, and lose the Dad Bod!
martial arts is the most powerful gift to give and receive
Let’s say you’re now a seasoned Martial Artist.
You’ve received the gift of great health, a lean body, a sharp mind like a Samurai, and the self-awareness of a Shaolin Monk.
And maybe you were taught by a great Master.
But to receive this great gift, you have to give something.
Now, who do you give these great gifts to? The obvious answer is your children!
You give, receive, and then you give again.
I remember when I first found out that I was having a son.
One of the first things I wanted to do was teach him Martial Arts.
I wanted to give what my Dad gave me, to my son.
I wanted to give him the best start in life, just like all Dads do.
But the difference was, that I realised the path to get him there.
I can personally vouch for the incredible gift that Martial Arts is.
I’m more focused, disciplined, calm, patient, efficient, aware, and much more!
For example, when I have a project deadline that’s approaching faster than I would like it to, I’m reminded of the feeling of stepping into the Boxing ring.
Being familiar with that feeling reminds me that correct preparation helps to channel those feelings of stress into energy.
I can’t think of another discipline or practice which can give so much in return.
It really is the gift that keeps on giving. And why not let it be a gift that gives for generations to come?
If you learn Martial Arts, and teach your kids, then they can teach their kids too.
In many Martial Arts traditions, the secrets of their art were only passed down through the family, as they were trade secrets. This can be something unique and a tradition you can create with your family.
So what will this gift result in?
I believe it will help to create a society of Warrior Dads who lead their families, communities, and the world by bringing back the balance and order that the modern world so desperately needs.
dads need self-defence, and your family does too!
I’ll start with the most obvious one…
If you’re a Dad who can’t defend himself, and his family, then imagine this.
In the middle of the night, you hear someone creeping around downstairs. Your wife is lying next to you, and your kids down the hallway.
How would you feel?
What would your next move be?
What would your wife expect… Or hope you would do if she woke up?
For you to go and investigate?
But how would you face that challenge?
When push comes to shove, your family will look at you, the Dad, the husband, the man to look after them.
There is a level of quiet confidence that you arrive at when you know how to defend yourself.
The same quiet confidence a room full of people feels when a seasoned Martial Artist walks in.
No looking around for someone to connect with, because they walk in complete, sure of themselves, and under control.
You don’t feel the need to go around proving yourself to others to bolster your ego, or you don’t feel the need to show off unnecessarily.
And if an altercation does happen, you know it will be a much better outcome for you and your family, if violence was the only answer.
I had a student in my Martial Arts school. He had trained in Karate since he was young, and was a solid well built 6ft 4.
Whenever he went out, he would have guys challenging him, probably to prove themselves.
But to who? Themselves.
Small man syndrome is not always about their height, although that usually was a factor.
Small-minded men, feel insecure in their abilities and are always the ones to create a show.
Jordan Peterson sums this up well, when he says, “You should be a monster. Everyone says, ‘Well, you should be harmless, virtuous, you shouldn’t do anyone any harm, you should sheath your competitive instinct. You shouldn’t try to win. You don’t want to be too aggressive. You don’t want to be too assertive.’ No. Wrong. You should be a monster, an absolute monster, and then you should learn how to control it.”
Any respectable Martial Artist knows this.
In training, we’re taught to not go around fighting people, but only to use our skills for self-defence.
The purpose of Martial Arts for life is to actually make you peaceful, awake, and a great contributor to society.
Just look at children in schools.
So many kids are bullied, because they lack the confidence and presence to stand up for themselves, and bullies know it.
They pick easy targets as a way to build up their ego, and show others whose boss.
The bullies haven’t arrived at this conclusion with some intellectual insight.
They can see it, and feel it in the kids who are easy targets.
When we used to have our Martial Arts School, so many parents brought their children into classes because they were getting bullied.
And unfortunately, many parents could not see why it was happening.
They didn’t realise they raised a soft, timid, and anxious child.
Sure, they didn’t do it intentionally, but it could have all been avoided quite easily.
And of the kids who were bullied, pretty much all of the time, the Dads weren’t able to defend themselves too, or they were not present in their kids’ lives.
Their Dads were never the ones who were willing to join in the adult classes, but were always the first to tell their kids where they were going wrong.
Dads, you need to lead from the front. In last week’s newsletter, we talked about why Dads need to lead by example, and this is a prime example of that.
you'll lose the dad bod with martial arts
Martial Arts by its nature is intense. It’s been created for combat, war, competition and as a Way of Life.
So to live up to its name, the training itself can be intense.
But don’t worry, with the right guidance, you’ll be starting at the level that is right for you.
With my students, most tend to be beginners, as they want to use Martial Arts as a way to get in shape.
Or they used to do Martial Arts a while back, and want to get back into it again, and be in the best shape of their lives.
So I meet them where they are at, but focus on where we will take them in their mind, body, and spirit development.
And when they are ready for it, we turn up the intensity notch, but all along the way, they are getting lean, and dropping the Dad Bod for good.
And as you’re constantly learning new skills, you’ll know how to defend yourself, get in shape, and you’re less likely to quit.
That’s a huge problem with many fitness programmes today.
If you took a look at their adherence rates it’s shocking.
You know this from experience right?
Think about any time you’ve tried to stick with a new diet or fitness programme, how consistent have you been?
It’s probably less than you wanted to be, and that’s understandable.
Most Dads I speak to lack the motivation to do the training as it’s boring.
They think standard weightlifting and maybe some running is the only way to train, until they find something like Martial Arts.
It’s also always a full body workout, meaning that you’re working your body as one unit which is great for your posture, improving your movement patterns, balance, speed, agility, strength and much more.
And these are athletic skills that every Dad should keep in his toolbox, and not just let age or belly fat get the better of him.
I’m not one for these kinds of stats or care for them, but for those who do, many say you can easily burn 430 to 600 calories in less than one hour of Kickboxing, which is the Martial Art I specialise in.
So with the right setup, coaching, and support, you will get rid of the Dad Bod for life by doing Martial Arts!
your family will respect you
As a Dad, you work hard to provide, and when you come home, you just want to relax.
But you and I both know that if you want to be a great Dad and husband, that won’t cut it.
Your family want and needs to respect you outside of your work and being a provider.
They need someone to look up to.
Someone to model.
Nothing will make any child look up to you like being able to emulate their favourite superhero’s best fighting moves.
I remember, I used to ask my Dad all the time if this technique from a movie was real, if it was possible, or if he could teach me how to do it.
By doing Martial Arts, you will radiate confidence, a growth mindset, and a body to match.
As they know all of your time isn’t just spent working or watching TV, when you do something for yourself like spending time doing Functional Strength Training or Martial Arts, they know you are trying to better yourself.
Over time, this grants you more respect.
But it’s only granted when you have earned it.
When you have earned that space in your children’s and wife’s minds; that you are not just the Dad or husband, but you are the best Dad and husband they could possibly have.
Respect is a funny thing for us men.
We want it due to the way we are wired.
When you are more respected in your family’s eyes, you have won them over.
You’re on the same team, and they will take refuge under your leadership, by submitting with their respect for you.
So what does this give you and your family?
It gives you the best chance at being the family unit you’ve always wanted or are striving for.
We live in days where weak families are the norm, and Dads complain about this and that struggle that they face as a Dad in the modern world.
I’m not going to sit here and say they aren’t real struggles.
They are. But what sets men apart who get respected and those who don’t?
It’s those who take serious action about righting the wrongs that they face.
Not the cowards who sit in fear, anxiety, and complaining.
Don’t let that be you, my fellow Dad, become a man worthy of the highest respect from yourself, and your family.
Then those around you will follow.
And this is how I truly believe that many of society’s problems will be remedied. When Dads start to respect themselves, and their families, then their communities will follow suit.
But you have to forge the path, and show those closest to you The Way.
Don’t leave it up to chance and to society to programme how the minds and bodies of your family turn out.
martial arts is a great stress reliever
One of the most satisfying things about Martial Arts, is that it allows you to positively channel your energy into targets, bags, pads, and even the air, in a way where you feel relieved after.
More people are being beaten by stress than ever.
And that’s not because times are harder than ever, in fact us men have never had it easier.
The problem is men have become weaker than ever in mind and body.
Do you think the warriors of the past fighting in war, defending their tribes, farming all day long to put food on the table for their families had time to worry about their anxiety or depression?
Modern millennials are complaining about never owning their own home…
And they’re the ones waiting for someone to save them.
No one is saving you…
No pill, no course, no retreat.
Once you make the decision to manage your stress, and not let it dominate your life you will find the tools to manage it.
A survey of 1000 men in the UK found that 77% of men polled have suffered from common mental health symptoms like anxiety, stress or depression.
The biggest causes of mental health issues in men’s lives are work (32%), their finances (31%) and their health (23%). And 40% of men have never spoken to anyone about their mental health.
But men don’t need to talk through their emotions all the time, and do constant therapy as new trends suggest.
We need action, and systems in place to keep the bad type of stress at bay.
And as a Dad, if you fix your health, guess what?
Everything else will improve as a result. Your work, finances, relationships, family, and so on.
I’d argue that there’s nothing like Martial Arts to make you feel present and at peace. And once you know the feeling, you won’t want to go back from it.
We all know that stressed parents equals stressed children, and stressed children are not the confident ones either.
You don’t want to be the angry, frustrated, short-tempered Dad as soon as you finish work.
You want to be calm, relaxed, and in control of your emotions. And just as importantly, in control of the direction of your life. Or at least the things which are within your control.
Martial Arts forces you to be present in the moment if you let it.
Whether you’re learning how to punch, or doing a round of Shadowboxing, you need to be in the here and now if you want to make the most out of each movement.
I believe this is due to the ancient nature of Martial Arts, along with our ancient relationship with it, fighting, and warfare.
Think about it. What other discipline gets you to exert your mind, body, and spirit in such a way where it connects the three so seamlessly?
And how else can you tap into that masculine instinct and drive in the modern world, which gives you a healthy outlet for your natural aggression?
And no matter what the modern world tells you, as men, and especially as Dads, we are naturally aggressive, it’s just what we do with that aggression that makes or breaks us.
takeaways on why should dads do martial arts?
That’s it! These are a few of my answers to the question, Why Should Dads Do Martial Arts?
To recap:
1. The Most Powerful Gift To Give And Receive – What other discipline or practice can give so much in return? It’s hard to think of one. And if you learn Martial Arts, and teach your kids, then they can teach their kids too.
2. Dads Need Self-Defence, And Your Family Does Too! – When push comes to shove, your family will look at you, the Dad, the husband, the man to look after them. And remember, the purpose of Martial Arts for life is to make you peaceful, awake, and a great contributor to society.
3. You’ll Lose The Dad Bod – As you’re constantly learning new skills, you’ll know how to defend yourself, get in shape, and you’re less likely to quit. And that’s a huge problem with many fitness programmes today. You can easily burn 430 to 600 calories in less than one hour of Kickboxing, which is more than enough to get in great shape!
4. Your Family Will Respect You – Nothing will make any child look up to you like being able to emulate their favourite superhero’s best fighting moves. By doing Martial Arts, you will radiate confidence, a growth mindset, and a body to match.
5. Martial Arts Is A Great Stress Reliever – There’s nothing like Martial Arts to make you feel present and at peace. Martial Arts forces you to be present in the moment if you let it. Us Dads need action, and systems in place to keep the bad type of stress at bay.
That’s it for today. See you next week for Samurai Wisdom For Strength In Fatherhood.
We will explore how the principles of the Bushido Code can fuel your fitness journey, combining Martial Arts discipline with modern insights. And why the Bushido Code is the perfect guide for Dads 👀
here are three ways i can help you to learn martial arts
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